Download Advanced Banter: The Qi Book of Quotations (QI) by Stephen Fry, Alan Davies, John Mitchinson PDF

By Stephen Fry, Alan Davies, John Mitchinson

The last word compendium of crisp one-liners, knockout jokes, droll asides and common truths gathered through the years via the creators of QI.

'You recognize 'that look' ladies get once they wish intercourse? Me neither.' Steve Martin; 'You can't hinder the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, yet you could hinder them from nesting on your hair.' chinese language proverb; 'The Beatles are loss of life within the flawed order.' Victor Lewis-Smith; 'Cauliflower is not anything yet a cabbage with a school education.' Mark Twain; 'Depend at the rabbit's foot in the event you will, yet take note: it didn't paintings for the rabbit.' R.E. Shay; 'If it weren't for quotations, dialog among gents will be an never-ending sequence of 'what-ho's!' P. G.Wodehouse

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Extra resources for Advanced Banter: The Qi Book of Quotations (QI)

Example text

Get him, right? ” “Look,” said Zaphod, “I’m up to here with cool, okay? I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis. ” “Well, if you’d let me explain, sir,” said the insect, tapping the most petulant of all the tentacles at its disposal, “I’m afraid that isn’t possible right now as Mr. ” Hell, thought Zaphod. ” he said. “Back, sir? ” Zaphod paused while he tried to sort this particular thought out in his mind. He didn’t succeed.

This had the effect of reminding Zaphod that he was talking to a ghost because he didn’t feel a thing. “You know and I know what being President means, young Zaphod. You know because you’ve been it, and I know because I’m dead and it gives one such a wonderfully uncluttered perspective. We have a saying up here. ’ ” “Yeah,” said Zaphod bitterly, “very good. Very deep. ” “Fifty seconds,” grunted Ford Prefect. ” said Zaphod Beeblebrox the Fourth. “Pontificating,” said Zaphod Beeblebrox. ” “Nobody else can,” whispered Zaphod.

Excellent! ” “A female from the same planet. ” “Good, good,” beamed Halfrunt. ” For an instant Halfrunt’s smile flickered. “Ah, yes,” he said, “I had been expecting this. ” inquired the Vogon, who had heard the expression somewhere once and decided to try it out. ” He paused. His mouth continued to smile, but his eyes frowned slightly. “But Beeblebrox, you know,” he said, “he is one of my most profitable clients. ” He toyed with this thought a little before reluctantly dismissing it. ” “Good.

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